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ARTICLES > HUMOUR


15 PLACES MALTESE TOWNS SHOULD NEVER TWIN WITH

Tags:   Fun,   Travel

By The Swag Team   -  February 17, 2015


   Fun malta,  Travel malta,  15 places Maltese towns should never twin with malta, Humour malta, Swag Mens Online Magazine Malta

Photo credit:  www.pmpcpa.com


We’ve all heard of and had a giggle about towns and villages with names that sound weird, funny or downright rude in English. Places like Batman in Turkey, Condom in France, Cunt in Spain, Fucking in Austria, Kunting in Gambia, Longdong in China, Middelfart in Denmark and finally, Wank, in Germany… the list goes on, and much as we were enjoying writing it, we need to get to the point.

 

And the point is: what about places around the world that sound rude exclusively to us Maltese? Under no pressure whatsoever, SWAG gave in to the pressing need for a list of such places to be compiled…

  1. MUSCAT, OMAN

1. MUSCAT, OMAN malta,  Imagine the protests and letters to the editor if Sliema Local Council proposed a twinning with this vibrant Middle Eastern city, that happens to share a name – or surname in this case – with the PM and leader of the Labour Party... 
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1. MUSCAT, OMAN

Imagine the protests and letters to the editor if Sliema Local Council proposed a twinning with this vibrant Middle Eastern city, that happens to share a name – or surname in this case – with the PM and leader of the Labour Party...



  2. YUZAWA, JAPAN

2. YUZAWA, JAPAN malta,  Japan is a country rich in Maltese-related silliness: the surname Hashimoto primary among them. In this case, don't you just hate that feeling of being used? 
 malta,  Fun malta,  Travel malta,  15 places Maltese towns should never twin with malta, Humour malta, Swag Mens Online Magazine Malta

2. YUZAWA, JAPAN

Japan is a country rich in Maltese-related silliness: the surname Hashimoto primary among them. In this case, don't you just hate that feeling of being used?



  3. BIELA, POLAND

3. BIELA, POLAND malta,  It is said the Poles changed the name of this town to graphically commemorate the incidents that took place during the Malta vs Poland World Cup qualifier in 1980. I don't see any Maltese town being eager to twin with this place, not even if last year’s sexy housewife Polish Eurovision girls turn out to be from there. 
 malta,  Fun malta,  Travel malta,  15 places Maltese towns should never twin with malta, Humour malta, Swag Mens Online Magazine Malta

3. BIELA, POLAND

It is said the Poles changed the name of this town to graphically commemorate the incidents that took place during the Malta vs Poland World Cup qualifier in 1980. I don't see any Maltese town being eager to twin with this place, not even if last year’s sexy housewife Polish Eurovision girls turn out to be from there.



  4. ZEBULON, USA

4. ZEBULON, USA malta,  Zebulon is the easternmost town in Wake County, North Carolina, USA. We're unsure if they named their town after any form of traditional welcome ceremony they perform on first time visitors.  
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4. ZEBULON, USA

Zebulon is the easternmost town in Wake County, North Carolina, USA. We're unsure if they named their town after any form of traditional welcome ceremony they perform on first time visitors. 



  5. MOMBASA, KENYA

5. MOMBASA, KENYA malta,  The second largest city in Kenya, an exotic country that offers more than a whiff of excitement for travellers. 
 malta,  Fun malta,  Travel malta,  15 places Maltese towns should never twin with malta, Humour malta, Swag Mens Online Magazine Malta

5. MOMBASA, KENYA

The second largest city in Kenya, an exotic country that offers more than a whiff of excitement for travellers.



  6. GRAND BASSA COUNTY, LIBERIA

6. GRAND BASSA COUNTY, LIBERIA malta,  Well that's the first time we've seen the words 'Grand' and 'Bassa' in the same sentence, but SWAG is a men's magazine and as real men, we believe they're better out than in - and the grander, the better. 
 malta,  Fun malta,  Travel malta,  15 places Maltese towns should never twin with malta, Humour malta, Swag Mens Online Magazine Malta

6. GRAND BASSA COUNTY, LIBERIA

Well that's the first time we've seen the words 'Grand' and 'Bassa' in the same sentence, but SWAG is a men's magazine and as real men, we believe they're better out than in - and the grander, the better.



  7. HARA ISLAND, ESTONIA

7. HARA ISLAND, ESTONIA malta,  Like Malta, Estonia is considered one of the small countries of Europe, especially in the economic and sport fields. Now we can say we have another thing in common. 
 malta,  Fun malta,  Travel malta,  15 places Maltese towns should never twin with malta, Humour malta, Swag Mens Online Magazine Malta

7. HARA ISLAND, ESTONIA

Like Malta, Estonia is considered one of the small countries of Europe, especially in the economic and sport fields. Now we can say we have another thing in common.



  8. HARJA, ROMANIA

8. HARJA, ROMANIA malta,  Harja is a small settlement on the E574 highway to the northeast of major city Brasov. But you probably don’t give a sh*t about that do you? 
 malta,  Fun malta,  Travel malta,  15 places Maltese towns should never twin with malta, Humour malta, Swag Mens Online Magazine Malta

8. HARJA, ROMANIA

Harja is a small settlement on the E574 highway to the northeast of major city Brasov. But you probably don’t give a sh*t about that do you?



  9. VRENSKI ZOB, SLOVENIA

9. VRENSKI ZOB, SLOVENIA malta,  The Slovenians like adding the Z-word to the end of their town names, this is one of two on this list. It's probably a hint for our local councils to stay away from making any twinning request: they're just not interested. 
 malta,  Fun malta,  Travel malta,  15 places Maltese towns should never twin with malta, Humour malta, Swag Mens Online Magazine Malta

9. VRENSKI ZOB, SLOVENIA

The Slovenians like adding the Z-word to the end of their town names, this is one of two on this list. It's probably a hint for our local councils to stay away from making any twinning request: they're just not interested.



  10. BABJI ZOB, SLOVENIA

10. BABJI ZOB, SLOVENIA malta,  We get Calypso's Cave and l-Ghar tal-Friefet... the Slovenians get The Cave Under Babji Zob, a phallic-encrusted national treasure. Life just isn't fair.  
 malta,  Fun malta,  Travel malta,  15 places Maltese towns should never twin with malta, Humour malta, Swag Mens Online Magazine Malta

10. BABJI ZOB, SLOVENIA

We get Calypso's Cave and l-Ghar tal-Friefet... the Slovenians get The Cave Under Babji Zob, a phallic-encrusted national treasure. Life just isn't fair. 



  11. OSHKOSH, USA

11. OSHKOSH, USA malta,  Oshkosh is a city in Wisconsin, United States, located where the Fox River enters Lake Winnebago. Any further comment is superflous. 
 malta,  Fun malta,  Travel malta,  15 places Maltese towns should never twin with malta, Humour malta, Swag Mens Online Magazine Malta

11. OSHKOSH, USA

Oshkosh is a city in Wisconsin, United States, located where the Fox River enters Lake Winnebago. Any further comment is superflous.



  12. OSH, KYRGYZSTAN

12. OSH, KYRGYZSTAN malta,  Osh is the second largest city in Kyrgyzstan, located in the Fergana Valley and often referred to as the "capital of the south". Sound just about right to us. 
 malta,  Fun malta,  Travel malta,  15 places Maltese towns should never twin with malta, Humour malta, Swag Mens Online Magazine Malta

12. OSH, KYRGYZSTAN

Osh is the second largest city in Kyrgyzstan, located in the Fergana Valley and often referred to as the "capital of the south". Sound just about right to us.



  13. LIBA, CZECH REPUBLIC

13. LIBA, CZECH REPUBLIC malta,  Not only do these delightful people, famous for their beer and supermodels,  give themselves this surname : they've called a village that too. 
 malta,  Fun malta,  Travel malta,  15 places Maltese towns should never twin with malta, Humour malta, Swag Mens Online Magazine Malta

13. LIBA, CZECH REPUBLIC

Not only do these delightful people, famous for their beer and supermodels, give themselves this surname: they've called a village that too.



  14. LIBAT, KENYA

14. LIBAT, KENYA malta,  It's those Kenyans again. We really should look into establishing closer ties with African countries, what with the  Liberians naming an entire people in our honour , Ghana naming their entire country after our national music and the Kenyans naming their towns in our language... 
 malta,  Fun malta,  Travel malta,  15 places Maltese towns should never twin with malta, Humour malta, Swag Mens Online Magazine Malta

14. LIBAT, KENYA

It's those Kenyans again. We really should look into establishing closer ties with African countries, what with the Liberians naming an entire people in our honour, Ghana naming their entire country after our national music and the Kenyans naming their towns in our language...



  15. CHIBA, JAPAN

15. CHIBA, JAPAN malta,  And the former two place names bring us neatly to Chiba, another Japanese place that really should be better known in Malta. 
 malta,  Fun malta,  Travel malta,  15 places Maltese towns should never twin with malta, Humour malta, Swag Mens Online Magazine Malta

15. CHIBA, JAPAN

And the former two place names bring us neatly to Chiba, another Japanese place that really should be better known in Malta.



  HONOURABLE MENTION: CASE ZOBBI, EMILIA ROMAGNA, ITALY

HONOURABLE MENTION: CASE ZOBBI, EMILIA ROMAGNA, ITALY malta,  'Case' not 'casa'. Not one house, but many. No dicking around there, that's for sure. 

   
 malta,  Fun malta,  Travel malta,  15 places Maltese towns should never twin with malta, Humour malta, Swag Mens Online Magazine Malta

HONOURABLE MENTION: CASE ZOBBI, EMILIA ROMAGNA, ITALY

'Case' not 'casa'. Not one house, but many. No dicking around there, that's for sure.

 






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